Most of the world’s population has experienced some kind of trauma. Even if you don’t realize it, the fact is someone or something has likely caused your world to “stop” at some point.
Trauma is hard to spot sometimes, but it could be a distant parent, a hard break up, losing a house, loved one or even a limb. Trauma hurts and can leave a lasting mark on a person. But what do you do if all you know is trauma?
Between divorce, a parents deployment, multiple surgeries, a massive mental and physical battle with the army, my childhood was not easy. Then I am forced to fight for my right to marry, handle a miscarriage, survive a possible death after delivery, taking in my niece the same day I find out I’m pregnant again, almost lose my niece, and my water breaking in the middle of “snow-magedon.” It’s been a crazy (almost) 25 years.
Our couples therapist told us we have been treading water through our marriage repeatedly because of the trauma we have faced together.
So it’s not crazy to imagine Captain and I struggle within our relationship? Validation. What a feeling! But now what?
Captain is learning to deal with my trauma. He has grown up so much in the last few months, in part to recurring issues and because of therapy, and helps without contest.
I am in therapy with a WONDERFUL counselor. I’m facing my issues, learning to allow myself forgiveness, and accepting assistance. Also, I forgive and assist Cap as much as possible because I realize where he’s been is not the same as where I have.
If YOU have trauma in your life, it is time to surround yourself with good people. Get professional help, practice self-care and SHARE with your loved ones. It is not an easy fight, but it’s worse when you’re doing it alone.